


Confession

by AnAngelsWasteland



Category: Life Is Strange
Genre: Caulscott - Freeform, F/M, I'm such caulscott trash????, Like, i love that pricefield, im so gay, its so bad, other than pricefield, theyre my otp, why
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-05-09 03:05:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5523080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnAngelsWasteland/pseuds/AnAngelsWasteland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Really fluffy cute as heck Caulscott. There's not enough fluffy caulscott in this world, guys. I aim to change that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by:  
> http://caulscott-is-life.tumblr.com/post/131601041381/caulscottart-%CA%96-%CA%96

The damp spring night calmed the two teenagers within an instant. It had been a very long time since Nathan had felt so serene and at peace. He looked up at the star-filled sky, then to the gorgeous girl to his left, then back to the sky. He sighed, leaning back on his hands, shifting his weight.  “This is… Nice,” he said, without much thought. That was a good thing- not having to think. Nothing was distracting him. Well, other than Max Caulfield.

 “Hey Nathan?”, she spoke softly, almost in a whisper. He looked over to her, waiting for her response. “Thanks for this. I really appreciate it. To quote a really swell guy… ‘This is nice.’” 

 

Nathan was flustered in response, unable to think of anything to say. Instead he said, “Can I confess something to you?” 

 

“Of course,” she said with a soft smile. 

 

 “You know I’m not great with words. I’m actually… Fucking awful with expressing myself. But whatever, I don’t care,” his face started to distort slightly, as his nervousness kicked in, “be cool Nathan,” he whispered under his breath. 

 

 Max giggled softly.  “Anyhow. This is going to sound stupid as hell, and very obvious, but I’m a mess. I’m a fucking mess, and you know it. Everyone knows it. But for whatever fucking reason, you… Enjoy me? I dunno, that’s really odd to me, but thanks and uh…” Nathan threw his hands up in the air. “I don’t fucking know, you’re just…” 

 

The young angst filled teenager shifted his weight, once again, grabbing his forearm. “You’re fucking perfect. Perfect in every aspect and I just… Thanks, Max. You have no idea how much that means to me.”

 

 Max just started at Nathan for awhile, blinking. Slowly, a large smile appeared on her face, forming into a soft laugh. 

 

“You’re not trash. But you are a massive dork. However, you’re my dork.”

 

 In an instant, Nathan’s face twisted into a large smile. Max grabbed his arm, and leaned in close. She kissed his nose lightly, playfully and inviting. Nathan took this moment to do his best to swoon over Max. 

 

So he kissed her. He kissed her passionately, allowing sparks to fly. After the moment, Max laid her head on his shoulder. Once again, the boy sighed.  

 

For once in his life, everything felt right.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone asked for another chapter, and I'm finally getting around to writing it.

Sometimes Nathan had dreams that would plague his soul. They were dreams of darkness. He supposed they were nightmares, but he felt as if nothing could describe the way he was feeling. Some say you feel the same way as if you were in love. He'd use it to describe a feeling of despair and hopelessness. 

Which is what he was feeling. 

Nathan hated sleeping. Nine times out of ten, he had awful thoughts consume his sleep. His psyche tortured by a life he once lived. An abusive father, a psychotic teacher, a shell of a young boy. 

He hated the way it felt, as if he would wake up and taste the pain that came his way. 

It was a bitter taste. 

Sometimes, though, when he was lucky, he'd dream of happy things. A new beginning, a beatiful girl by his side, the flesh of a new life. 

This was not one of those times. 

Nathan felt like he was drowning. He was drowning in an odd tar like substance. It felt like jello as he bounced in a darkness. His screams could not be heard. His pointless screams ended when the liquid-esque substance was swallowed. He remembered not being able to breathe. Such a horrible thing to feel- the feeling of suffocating, lungs on fire, the brain urging and yearning of the sweet relief. Nathan knew he needed air, but there was none to be had. 

When he came to, there was shouting. He could never understand what the yelling was. It was inaudible, other than the occasional words that would ring through cold air. They sliced like a knife through bread. It hurt. 

Worthless.   
Pathetic.   
Inexcusable.   
Disaster. 

He wished he was drowning again. 

When he woke up again, he realized he was crying. Nathan's head hurt in a pounding sort of way as tears followed, rolling down his face. He groggily and gingerly turned his head to the alarm clock. 

5:21. 

He looked around his darkly lit room in order to calm himself once more. A deep breath in, a deep one out. In the nose, out the mouth. He had been through this procedure before, countless amounts of times. This was nothing new, nothing he shouldn't be able to handle. 

Once the panic subsided, he checked his alarm again. 

5:42. 

He was still crying, but at least he felt like he had regained his steadied breathing. He reached for the desk where his alarm resided. He grabbed his phone, scrolling through the top of his messages. 

"Maxine."

He clicked the name. 

"Hey... Max? Would you be willing to drop by this morning? I'll buy you breakfast or coffee... Something. I could just use a beautiful face to look at." His finger hovered over the send button. Shakily, he sent it. 

He closed his eyes. Nathan breathed. 

He hoped everything would be okay.


	3. Chapter 3

Max woke up shortly after receiving her text from Nathan. Her eyes blurred, facing the open window of her dorm room. Her tiny plant bloomed. She debated whether or not she should get out of bed, or sleep in for just a moment longer. 

She pushed her soft fleece blankets off of her body, and yawned loudly. She tip-toed around her slightly unkempt room. Mental note: clean your room later before classes. 

As she watched her step around her room, she would find herself distracted with little things. Pictures that just didn't feel right, soft noises of others walking down halls, and among other things. 

Max ran a hand threw her hair as she walked down the hallway in her ratted "Blue Stars" tank top. Her first step was to brush her teeth, then use the bathroom. Maybe she would say hello to Kate, or find other ways to avoid cleaning her room. 

She just wasn't feeling it today. 

As she finished her bathroom hygienics, Max paused again to fix her hair. A lock of hair refused to stay with the other layers. Normally she wouldn't be so caught up with these sorts of things. 

She sighed, before heading back to her room. She started to pick up the objects that were blocked the walkway. Random clothes that didn't belong on the floor, pictures that had fallen from the walls, countless trinkets. Maybe her room was a little more than slightly messy. 

Yikes, she thought to herself. I really should clean. 

Max wouldn't clean, though, as she checked over her phone. Two text messages from her mother, one from a drunk Warren (another problem she would have to fix later on), and one from Nathan. 

She wasn't sure whether or not she was supposed to smile or be worried at the text in front of her. With Nathan, it was sort of hit-or-miss. You could never really tell. But maybe that's what she liked. Sometimes not knowing was part of the adventure. 

Max responded to the text rapidly: "Wozers, kiddo, I'll be right over. Just stay where you are, okay?"

She threw on a pair of pajama shorts over her underwear. She wouldn't want to be caught indecent around campus. Sneaking into the boy's dorm wasn't even allowed to begin with. She didn't feel the need to add fuel to the fire. 

She walked to the boy's dorm, avoiding making eye contact with anyone she might pass. She decided to text Warren back with minimal response. Something about getting asked to "Go Ape", again. She wished Warren would take a hint sometimes. 

She knocked quietly on Nathan's bedroom door, in case he had fallen back asleep. Part of her hoped that was the story. That everything was okay, and that Nathan had just missed her. 

When he opened the door, though, she knew that wasn't the case. He had dark bags under her eyes. His eyes were red. He just looked tired- like the poor child hadn't slept since age two. She sighed, wrapping her arms around her boyfriend. 

It looked like cleaning her room would have to wait.


	4. Chapter 4

Max didn't have to ask what had happened. She just knew. They'd only dated for a short while, a handful of months, but it didn't take a PhD to figure out that Nathan needed help. She kept her arms wrapped around his neck, as she waited for reciprocation. 

Slowly, Nathan felt his arms do a similar motion. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and buried his face into her shoulder. They stood in the doorway for minutes, before Nathan invited her in. She sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for Nathan to explain the situation. He, however, laid face first into the plush carpet. 

Max rolled her eyes playfully, before squatting down and running her fingers through the back of his hair. He was like a puppy. A sad one, at the moment, but a puppy, nonetheless. 

"Nathan, you know I can't really help you if you don't tell me what is going on." She said softly, coaxing him out of any fear that was preventing him from doing so. 

He lifted his head up from the carpet. He gave a very tired smile. He tried his damnedest. "I'm just... Max, I'm very tired."

The boy started to rise to his knees, as Max offered a kind hand to help him up. He sat on the bed, looking towards the pillow as if he thought about climbing back into bed. He knew Max wouldn't mind. 

"I'm just very tired of all the bad things that happen. Why do bad things happen to semi-decent people? I know I'm not a good person, but dammit, Max, I'm trying. You know that. I know that. So I'm just... I'm just tired of everything that has happened thus far. I could use a break, you know? This just really fucking sucks. I can't even imagine what it's like for you. Having a basket case for a boyfriend." He laughed slightly. It was a forced laugh. Max wasn't stupid. She knew how he operated. 

She sighed slightly, rising up from her own position, and joining Nathan on the edge of the bed. She grabbed his hand and squeezed. Nerves helped Nathan. Anything with feeling that made him realize he was still here, still feeling something. 

"You aren't a bad person, Nathan. You may have done some bad things, but that doesn't make you a bad person. You've been given this amazing opportunity to live on, and keep living. I'm here to help you through it, okay?" She turned his face towards him to look her in the eye. "I trust you, and I care about you. Nathan, I love you more than most things I do in this world. I know you know that. If I didn't, I wouldn't be here to take care of you and make sure you're okay whenever I can. I know there are going to be times when I can't do that, but I'm here right now, and I'm here for you. Because I love you."

The words slipped out in somewhat of a hot rage. It was only 6:20. Much too early for confessions of love and admiration. She mentally slapped herself. Now she was the one that probably looked like a mess. She just wished she could convey how she felt in more than words or actions. It's like there wasn't enough that she could do to explain herself. 

Nathan looked at her, like what a small child would do in a new location. He processed the words slowly. Love. Almost as if it was a foreign concept. It had been awhile since he felt something like that from someone. 

Instead of saying the terrifying four words back to her, he grabbed her hand, squeezing it, before finding his lips on hers. He wanted this moment to be real. He wanted all of this memory to be real, to feel it. He needed this. 

Maybe this wasn't exactly healthy, relying purely on one girl to help save him from this awful rut he was in. Maybe it wasn't smart to fall for a girl during his years of school. Maybe it wasn't smart to get so attached to someone in a short amount of time, but he did. Nathan didn't care. He suddenly felt remorse and anger for who he once was. He no longer wanted to be associated with that person, who he was. He wanted to get better, for Max. 

No, he wanted to get better for himself. 

He pledged he would. 

When the kiss was over, his lips were empty, and his emotions now intact, he caressed the side of Max's cheek with the back of his hand. He looked into her eyes and sighed. This was it. 

"And I love you too, Maxine. There is nothing in this god damned world that will change that. Not even myself. Thank you for doing everything you can for me. It's time I do the same for you." He stopped speaking, catching his breath. It was like he was falling through thick air. It was hard to breathe, but in a good way. He didn't quite understand it. 

He tried his best to enjoy it, though. 

Nathan kissed Max's nose before continuing. "So, ready to go get that coffee?" 

Max laughed to herself. "I'm not even dressed, and you're missing some pants there," she said as she pointed to the boxer-clad boy in front of her. 

"I hardly doubt Joyce would care," he said as he pulled a pair of fresh jeans from his drawer. He struggled to put them on, placing the wrong foot in the wrong slot. Max laughed again, softly. She was amused at his surprised clumsiness. 

Once his pants were back on, he grabbed Max's hand and lead her out of his room. 

He wasn't sure how he was so lucky to have such a beautiful girl willingly get coffee with him, but he didn't want to question it too much. 

He loved it, regardless. 

He loved her, regardless.


	5. Chapter 5

They walked to the diner in silence. Thoughts refused to be spoken words. It was a silence that Max had gotten used to. She almost welcomed it. It was not that she was thrilled about the lack of words that seemed to dance on the tip of her tongue. She'd just have to find another time to say them. As of right now, it was recovery time for Nathan. 

He tugged on her hand slightly, his palms sweaty. They glazed over her tiny fingers. She laced her fingers within his, and sighed. The process seemed to cycle. It was working as of this moment. She had hoped that the diner would attempt to revive his tired mind. 

Typically it did. 

Whenever Nathan had a rough ... Well, a rough patch of time, they would stroll along to the diner. It didn't matter what time, as the restaurant was normally opened at long hours. Joyce never took a break for the townspeople. 

Max was thankful for it. 

She wasn't sure who started this tradition of late night snacking and early morning walks, but she was sure as hell happy that it gave her mind a moment to relax, as well. 

She hated to admit it, but Nathan was taxing at times. Not that she didn't love him, but taking care of a broken heart... It is hard to not break your own in the process. She knew she had to take it one step at a time. 

She felt blessed for the silence. 

Before she knew it, her hand grazed over the cold metal of the entrance. A familiar and light "ding" of chimes entered the building.

"Hey fuckwads," says a tired voice from behind the counter. Surprisingly, it was not Joyce at the counter, but Chloe. Max smiled to herself, as she watched the blue-haired girl kick up her feet on the counter. 

"Okay, I've got to take a picture of this," Max said, as she untwined her fingers from Nathan's. She felt around for her phone in the pockets of her shorts. She couldn't quite remember where she had put it last. She found it after searching all four. "Hey, it isn't your dad's camera, but this will sure as hell work. Maybe a little informal, but it's what I've got to work with."

Chloe laughs slightly, before returning to her feet. She leans against the counter, eye-balling the two of them. Nathan couldn't get the thought out of his head that Chloe didn't trust him. Not that he could blame her, though. 

"Okay, seriously. As much as I love Paparazzi Max, I've got a business to take care of here. What can I get you guys today? As you can see, I'm loosing my god damn mind here. Full house and everything." She points to the empty business and laughs. 

"Slow morning?" Suggests Nathan quietly. Normally he is loud and unafraid to speak his mind. Especially with Chloe. Max figured he was still recovering from this mornings events. 

Chloe follows them to the booth and plops down next to Max. "Something like that." She looks at the two, "so let me guess- water for the pretty girl, and a large cup of coffee for the moody asshole. I'm assuming black?"

"Half-caffeine. I need creamer, I'm not that much of a monster."

Chloe shrugged, "Coulda fooled me, I'll be back with the drinks."

Max started at the boy across from him. She turned her eyes back to Chloe, who had gone into the back room to grab the cups for the drinks. Her eyes returned to Nathan. He looked visibly tired, like he hadn't slept in years. He always looked like this. Her heart fell in empathy. 

"Are you okay?" she asks softly, reaching out to place her hand on the table. 

He follows suit, gently placing his hand on top of hers. "I could be better, I suppose. But Jesus... I think I'm-"

His thoughts were interrupted by the blue-haired girl. "Okay, so I've got the water for the Selfie Queen, and the largest cup of coffee I could muster for King Rich Britches over here." She placed before him the entire coffee pot and a large mug. Chloe walked back to the counter before yelling: "I hope you don't mind, but you're all getting easy-bake muffins. Mom just told me not to burn the place down! So I'm not wasting my energy on you all. Sorry not sorry!" Chloe winked playfully at them. Max had only hoped she was half joking. Her eyes returned to the boy in front of her. 

Max shook her head slightly before watching Nathan gingerly poor his coffee into his cup. His hand shook wildly. She sighed, Yikes Nathan, she thought. Today must be worse than she originally had assumed. 

He took multiple sugar packets from the side of the table before dumping it in his cup. He blew on the steaming coffee and took a slight sip. "Like I was saying... I'm just tired right now, Max. It was nothing more than usual. Shitty dreams, shitty life, am I right?" He tried to crack a joke, which resulted in a failed smile from both parties. Max's heart increased with worry, Nathan's slightly saddened. "But listen, you don't have to worry about me all the time. It's just another one of my fucking breakdowns. It's not like we don't go through this daily, you know? I've got this under control. I can handle it. I'm the boss." This time his smile came off as more sincere. Max felt happier with this. 

"Okay, I'll try to just give you space with it then? You know I worry about you. Which is ridiculously stupid, but I do worry." 

Nathan's smile twitched slightly. "I just need you by my side. That's why we're here, isn't it? I'll be okay, otherwise."

The blue blur slid over in what can only be described as a mosh-esque stop. "Okay, kiddos, hate to interrupt, but as promised..." She placed the still-steaming muffins in front of the young teenagers faces. "Breakfast is on."

She snagged a muffin of her own, before squeezing next to Nathan. 

"Are you being cereal?" Max said, with a slight attitude rising. 

Chloe laughed slightly. "I can't tell if you're making a poorly worded pun, or if you're just being Max."

"Maybe a little bit of both, but that's besides the point. I'm trying to have a conversation here," she said, motioning towards Nathan. 

"Okay, okay," Chloe scooted out of the seat, and back into the aisle that she came from. "I get the picture. You lovebirds make out in this booth while I make sure none of mom's shit gets stolen in the back. I'll just act like I was never here, and that I can't see you from where I'm standing." She winked once more before disappearing out of Max's sight. 

Max looked once more at Nathan's tired eyes and waited for him to continue. "It's just like I'm shaking hands with all the dark parts of my thoughts, as if I'm greeting them and letting in. I shouldn't be letting them in and explore my fucking head, because God damn, you know me, I shouldn't have to ramble on and explain but... Max... It's the only thing I know." His words fell quickly out of his mouth, only to stumble and stop at certain phrases, as if his mind was running a marathon with his mouth. His brain seemed to be winning. "I'm just tired, like I said. I'm tired of it all. I've got a lot weighing on me, and it really feels like this shit is starting to claw at me."

Max nodded, grabbing his hand, leading him out of the restaurant. She'd have to pay Chloe at another time, because her maternal instincts had started to kick in. "We're going to try something, okay? We're just going to take a nap together."

Nathan didn't object to the thought of a full morning of sleep. He just wondered how lucky he was to have such an amazing girl lead him to his own bed. How the actual fuck? He'd never know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jesus fucking Christ did writing this feel long.   
> But it was worth it, because it was dedicated to the most amazing person I know. Thanks for being such a big support, Erin. :-)


End file.
